Blogging in Earnest

I've decided going forward I want to add something permanent to the internet at least once a day. I've let myself become a spectator in online communities in a way that is really not good. I have so much to say and I really ought to start screaming out on this platform that no one knows about. I want to get into the habit of creating things. I don't create anything, I only consume. Even my present work is just consumption. The goal is to keep eating up math papers until I understand enough to contribute. But how can I hope to contribute big things if I cannot contribute small things? I have all kinds of pie in the sky ideas for things I could make. Truly I live in wonderful times. There is nothing stopping me from making music, video games, writing, art which could in theory reach millions of people. I have all the technology at my fingertips right now to make any string of text, to make any sound to edit any image. I've just gotta start imagining things. I've got to turn off the part of my brain that enumerates the things I need to learn to get started. Or the part of my brain that thinks about how much time it'll take to make something at all competent. And how even after some sort of competency is achieved there is no guarantee of ever making something I'll be satisfied with.

So my goal is to make something permanently and publicly available on the internet everyday. To make things easy for myself in the beginning I imagine a lot of those things will be blog posts. Hopefully not too many of them will be meta blog posts but I've really got to start somewhere. I can't wait until I'm ready. I've been waiting for a long time. In the long term I'd like to make this site beautiful. I have ideas for Android Apps and Youtube videos. I think it'd be cool to make a math podcast. I'd like to make some illustrations. I'd like to stream myself doing programming contests and mtgo tournaments. So many ideas and so little time!

All my worries about this project fade away when I state them concretely.

• What if the things I say are stupid and pointless? No one will read them anyway! Who cares? Maybe if they're obviously stupid someone will let me know and I will benefit.
• What if someday I'm a serious person and I'm embarrassed by my work here? Well I can always delete it. And lots of artists have early work that doesn't stand up to their eventual standards. The early XKCDs are a little weird and not in the later regular style. It's naive expect to start doing good work before producing mountains of shitty work. Maybe its vaguely pointless to publish shitty work but the process of using html, js etc. and AWS are themselves things I want to improve at.
• My css is ugly! Well I can change that before I go and post this site anywhere. So that doesn't really matter. I bet in the year 20XX when readers have gotten down here they won't know what this bullet is even about!
• I don't have the time to content daily! Even content that is barely above stream of conscious! Bullshit! I have so much time. If I just took all the time I spend consuming things and instead produced something I'd have oodles of time to produce all the shit I want. And I deeply believe I'd be better for it.

Hopefully having made a public commitment I'll stick to it. Not that I have a history of honoring commitments. Now seems like a good time to start. I gotta start before its too late.